**BREAKING NEWS** Storms' in Penrith.............
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Topic: **BREAKING NEWS** Storms' in Penrith.............
Posted By: Hatchetman
Subject: **BREAKING NEWS** Storms' in Penrith.............
Date Posted: December 21 2008 at 5:12pm
Hurricane Shazza hit Penrith in
the early hours of 17th November 2008. Victims were seen wandering
around aimlessly, muttering 'Faaackinell'. The hurricane
devastated the area causing approximately $30 worth of damage. Three
areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken
well before their Centrelink cheques arrived. The Penrith
Times reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered
and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something
interesting had happened in Penrith . One resident - Tracy
Maree Sharon Britney Madonna Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 3 said 'It
was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my
bedroom crying. My youngest two Joachim and River slept through it
all.' Apparently, looting, muggings and car crime were
unaffected and carried on as normal. The Australian Red Cross has so
far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Bacardi-Breezers to the area to
help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through
the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings,
including Health Care Cards, Jewellery from Kmart, and Bone China from
Big W. HOW CAN YOU
HELP?
This appeal is to raise money for food and
clothing parcels for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this
disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include:
flannelette shirts, tight blue jeans or spandex, singlets (blue &
white) white sport socks, Ugg boots and any other items usually sold in
Priceline or The Reject Shop. Food parcels may be harder to come by,
but are needed all the same. Required foodstuffs urgently
needed include: Microwave meals, Baked beans, Ice cream, Chips, Fizzy
drinks. Donations of $15.00 will be taken to buy a packet of
winny blue 25s and a lighter to calm the nerves of those
affected.
**Breaking
news**
Penrith Uniting Church has cancelled their local 'Nativity
Display' due to their inability to find three wise men or a virgin.
Please don't forward this to anyone living in Penrith - oh, stuff it,
they won't be able to read it, anyway!
------------- But the winters coming,
And the snow will cover tracks,
And I'll be watching,
Because I'm hunting you
- Sarah Blasko, The Gardens End
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Replies:
Posted By: Shamu
Date Posted: December 21 2008 at 8:01pm
Sounds like a luvverly spot to avoid.
In the U.S. the spandex would be specified as XXL & up only.
------------- Don't shoot till you see the whites of their thighs. (Unofficial motto of the Royal Air Force)
|
Posted By: Lost Kangaroo
Date Posted: December 22 2008 at 8:09am
Hah, nice Hatch... I have a feeling you may have left a few of our "foreigners" here behind :)
------------- Get some
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Posted By: SW28fan
Date Posted: December 22 2008 at 10:11am
Posted By: Ed Hill
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 8:59am
[QUOTE=Lost Kangaroo]Hah, nice Hatch... I have a feeling you may have left a few of our "foreigners" here behind :)
Actually, you can make it a Northern California joke by changing the name to Rio Linda! Everything else can stay the same!
Ed
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Posted By: thresher_593
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 9:48am
There are parts of Ohio where a tornado is considered an urban renewal project.
------------- Hiding out in the Northwest corner of Southeast Ohio
|
Posted By: SW28fan
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 11:10am
OK my curiosity wins what are"winny blue 25s"?
------------- Have a Nice Day If already having a nice day please disregard
|
Posted By: Shamu
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 11:21am
Mine too.
What am I missing?
------------- Don't shoot till you see the whites of their thighs. (Unofficial motto of the Royal Air Force)
|
Posted By: Hatchetman
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 2:53pm
Durries, Winfield Blue Cigarettes, 25 pack.
------------- But the winters coming,
And the snow will cover tracks,
And I'll be watching,
Because I'm hunting you
- Sarah Blasko, The Gardens End
|
Posted By: SW28fan
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 3:30pm
Neat, I tried Winfield Cigarettes when I was in Perth back in 82 except they were in a red pack.
------------- Have a Nice Day If already having a nice day please disregard
|
Posted By: Lost Kangaroo
Date Posted: December 23 2008 at 8:34pm
The blues are much "classier" but the reds will kill ya quicker....
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Winfield_(cigarette)
------------- Get some
|
Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: December 24 2008 at 3:17pm
Hatchetman wrote:
Hurricane Shazza hit Penrith in
the early hours of 17th November 2008. Victims were seen wandering
around aimlessly, muttering 'Faaackinell'. The hurricane
devastated the area causing approximately $30 worth of damage. Three
areas of historic burnt out cars were disturbed. Many locals were woken
well before their Centrelink cheques arrived. The Penrith
Times reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered
and were still trying to come to terms with the fact that something
interesting had happened in Penrith . One resident - Tracy
Maree Sharon Britney Madonna Smith, a 15-year-old mother of 3 said 'It
was such a shock, my little Chardonnay-Mercedes came running into my
bedroom crying. My youngest two Joachim and River slept through it
all.' Apparently, looting, muggings and car crime were
unaffected and carried on as normal. The Australian Red Cross has so
far managed to ship 4,000 crates of Bacardi-Breezers to the area to
help the stricken locals. Rescue workers are still searching through
the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings,
including Health Care Cards, Jewellery from Kmart, and Bone China from
Big W. HOW CAN YOU
HELP?
This appeal is to raise money for food and
clothing parcels for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this
disaster. Clothing is most sought after - items most needed include:
flannelette shirts, tight blue jeans or spandex, singlets (blue &
white) white sport socks, Ugg boots and any other items usually sold in
Priceline or The Reject Shop. Food parcels may be harder to come by,
but are needed all the same. Required foodstuffs urgently
needed include: Microwave meals, Baked beans, Ice cream, Chips, Fizzy
drinks. Donations of $15.00 will be taken to buy a packet of
winny blue 25s and a lighter to calm the nerves of those
affected.
**Breaking
news**
Penrith Uniting Church has cancelled their local 'Nativity
Display' due to their inability to find three wise men or a virgin.
Please don't forward this to anyone living in Penrith - oh, stuff it,
they won't be able to read it, anyway!
|
" Achmed the Dead Terrorist " Has been quoted (speaking for the Lebanese Community) as saying in reply to this News break ..........
Silence !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I Kill You !!!!!!
|
Posted By: hoadie
Date Posted: December 25 2008 at 12:40pm
thresher_593 wrote:
There are parts of Ohio where a tornado is considered an urban renewal project. |
I'm absolutley convinced that God hates trailer parks...EVERY time you see a news clip about a tornado touching down stateside-it ALWAYS seems to involve a trailer park!!
I remember one time drivin to Fla. on I-75(back in the 70's).The sky was BLACK...the radio was on emergency transmission re:Tornados in the area.We couldnt see anything...but when we came over the hill,it musta JUST passed-cause the debris was EVERYWHERE!!I guess it hit a trailerpark in the area.You can imagine the debris field...(Never seen so many pairs of women's spandex pants in one area before!)
Hoadie
------------- Loose wimmen tightened here
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Posted By: Cookie Monster
Date Posted: December 26 2008 at 1:11am
Weather will be in the mid 80'sF here today with Tornado warnings issued for this evening.
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